The David Kaufer Podcast: The Lighter Side of the Spectrum

Looking at Late Autism Diagnoses with Dr. Claire Jack

David interviews Dr. Claire Jack, a psychologist, writer, and host of the Autistic Minds podcast, about identity, late diagnosis, masking, and burnout. Dr. Jack describes learning about autism in her late forties after a therapist suggested it following a meltdown, then researching, blogging, writing books, and attracting autistic clients. She reflects on childhood signs (intense imagination, shyness, migraines, sensory sensitivities) that were accommodated rather than recognized, and explains how diagnosis reframed lifelong struggles, reduced self-criticism, and helped her set boundaries and act on her own terms. They discuss why autism is often missed in girls and women, how masking includes hiding stimming and rehearsing social language, and how ABA-related pressures (e.g., forced eye contact) can be harmful. Dr. Jack notes that feeling different isn’t always autism and shares a tip on noticing early signs of emotional dysregulation to prevent meltdowns and reduce shame. She addresses menopause-related sensory and healthcare-communication challenges for autistic women, shares a “kidnapped bus” misunderstanding illustrating predictive processing, and David shares his nonspeaking son Stone’s letter advocating for inclusive poetry contest participation.
 
Email David at david.kaufer@hey.com
Find Claire at https://www.autism-assessment-online.com/
 
Topics
00:38 Meet Dr Claire Jack
01:56 Late Autism Discovery
05:14 Childhood Signs Missed
07:56 Diagnosis Reframes Life
11:26 Why Adults Seek Answers
13:26 Autism in Women
16:48 What Masking Means
21:32 When Masking Exhausts
24:01 ABA and Eye Contact
26:09 Eye Contact Shifts
26:34 Feeling Different Debate
28:07 Self Diagnosis Pitfalls
29:27 Tip Emotional Regulation
34:26 Menopause Differences
37:41 Confession Bus Hijack
45:04 Light Spectrum Story
48:50 Final Advice Wrap Up

Guy Stephens on Trauma, Policy, and Safer Supports

David welcomes Guy Stephens, founder and executive director of the Alliance Against Seclusion and Restraint (founded 2019), who explains how repeated restraint and seclusion of his son—starting at age six and escalating in 2018—led him to advocacy after learning these practices violated Maryland’s legal thresholds and can cause lasting trauma, injuries, and even deaths (including the 2018 death of 13-year-old Max Benson). Stephens argues restraint should be exceedingly rare and seclusion never appropriate, emphasizing upstream prevention through trauma-informed, neuroscience-aligned, neurodiversity-affirming, relationship-driven, collaborative approaches and alternatives like reframing behavior. The conversation also covers weakened federal complaint capacity, concerns about the national autism coordinator’s background, recent legislative progress (including Maryland’s seclusion ban and Washington’s limits), and parent guidance on recognizing euphemisms, requesting reports/footage, and pursuing IEP actions or complaints.
 
Topics
02:19 Meet Guy Stephens
04:07 A Father’s Wake Up Call
05:31 School Trauma Escalates
07:50 A Promise Becomes A Mission
09:47 What The Data Shows
12:09 Trauma Injuries And Deaths
16:09 Safety Arguments And Real Standards
21:20 Upstream Prevention And Limits
23:37 Federal Oversight At Risk
25:50 DOJ Investigations And Settlements
27:33 New Autism Coordinator Concerns
28:17 Human Rights Concerns
29:06 Restraint Seclusion Data
30:45 Banning Harmful Practices
32:26 Five Upstream Principles
38:14 Programs That Shift Culture
39:36 Parent Rights And Questions
44:35 Confessions And Lessons
49:19 Hopeful Policy Progress
50:39 Tools Data And Wrap Up

Autism News Roundup: Communication Rights & Policy Updates

David records from Orcas Island with producer Dave Yas and shares a supportive listener message about presuming competence, a shift to viewing autism as sensory-motor differences, and pursuing Spelling to Communicate while ending an eight-year ABA relationship. They discuss New York’s proposed communication rights bill, noting Senate Disability Committee chair Patricia Fahy added “validated” and “autonomous” language viewed as a harmful limitation for nonspeakers, and highlight advocacy urging removal. They cover states, including Washington, banning school seclusion rooms and restraint, distinguishing them from sensory rooms. They address RFK Jr. and President Trump’s promotion of leucovorin as an autism “breakthrough,” and the FDA limiting it to cerebral folate deficiency. They also describe upheaval and delays around the federal IACC and a new science-focused shadow committee. The episode ends with parenting confessions about reacting during vomiting and seizure-related events and a Duran Duran tribute show experience.
 
Topics
00:40 Recording from Orcas Island
01:42 Baseball Season Begins
03:08 Iconic Sports Moments
04:01 Listener Feedback and Impact
07:11 New York Communication Rights Bill
09:07 Poison Pill Language Inserted
12:49 Call to Action
15:03 Featured in a Blog
16:52 Banning Seclusion and Restraint
17:17 Understanding Seclusion Rooms
18:44 Harmful Impact on Students
21:27 Progress Across States
22:03 Autism Drug Hype
24:41 False Hope and Services
26:11 IACC Shakeup
28:46 Shadow Committee Debate
30:20 Politics Over Expertise
32:38 Fighting Misinformation
34:49 Parent Confession Chaos
38:15 Seizure Aftermath Lesson
40:52 Dave Confession Exit Early
41:30 Duran Duran Tribute Moment
42:57 Monthly Wrap Up

Dr. Barry Prizant on Presuming Competence & the Power of Community

David welcomes Dr. Barry Prizant—speech-language pathologist, researcher, consultant, and author of "Uniquely Human"—to discuss how autism conversations can shift from deficits and pathology to dignity, emotional safety, and relationship-based support. Prizant recounts entering the field through a summer camp job, early experiences with bullying and “othering,” and a career blending academic work with “in the trenches” consulting. He describes research that depathologized echolalia by documenting its communicative functions and critiques traditional applied behavior analysis for compliance training, extinguishing behaviors without understanding “why,” and dismissing internal experience. David and Prizant share “parent/professional confessions” about misreading autistic attention and forcing participation, emphasize listening to autistic people and families, and address trauma, selective mutism, non-speaking communication, and coordinated misinformation. They close on the importance of supportive communities for parents and autistic people.
 
Email David at david.kaufer@hey.com
 
More on Barry at https://barryprizant.com/
 
Topics
00:39 Meet Barry Prizant
02:41 Early Career Origins
04:31 Empathy and Othering
06:41 Academic and Clinical Path
08:40 Challenging Old Autism Models
14:51 Listening and Parent Retreats
16:12 Why Uniquely Human
18:24 Nonspeaking and Presuming Competence
20:26 Parent Confessions Segment
25:09 Unlearning and ABA Debate
27:08 What ABA Is
27:47 Chomsky vs Skinner
28:59 Ask Why First
30:07 ABA Compliance Risks
32:53 Unlearning and Propaganda
34:52 Attacks and Misinformation
39:37 Neurodiversity and Competence
40:49 Autism Fact or Fiction
44:10 Trauma and Speech
50:03 Finding Your Community
52:42 Closing Thanks
 

Structural Grief and Autonomy in Parenting with Dr. Debra Brause

David welcomes clinical psychologist Dr. Debra Brause, a California-based writer for Psychology Today and mother of a neurodivergent teen, to discuss “structural grief,” which Brause notes was coined by Dr. Michael Hogue: grief not about the child, but about ableist, capitalist systems (school, healthcare, benefits) and collapsed normative timelines. In an autism fact-or-fiction segment, Brause challenges the belief that parents must grieve the child they expected, reframing grief as systemic and inviting a reorientation toward presence, care, and community. They discuss homeschooling after harmful school experiences, and distinguish autonomy (self-direction with support) from independence (doing things alone). Brause’s tip urges parents to notice triggers, address unresolved trauma, and avoid shaming behaviors like stimming; she recommends mindful self-compassion resources and community support such as Tilt Parenting.
Topics
00:36 Meet Dr Debra Brause
03:00 Her Journey to Autism
05:17 Autism Fact or Fiction
06:02 Rethinking Parental Grief
12:25 Defining Structural Grief
14:52 School System Breaking Points
19:56 Autonomy vs Independence
22:50 Fear of Disability Culture
24:13 Setting Up Tip Segment
24:39 Do Your Own Work
25:07 Triggers and Stimming
26:58 Compliance vs Acceptance
27:47 Fears and Behavior Therapy
31:03 Rupture and Repair
33:47 Forgiveness and Trauma Time
35:48 Mindful Self Compassion
39:02 Writing and Advocacy
41:20 Parent Confession Fix It Mode
44:55 Community and Support
47:15 Connect and Wrap Up

Transforming Autism Support with Dr. Amy Laurent

David welcomes Dr. Amy Laurent, developmental psychologist, co-creator of the SCERTS Model and co-founder of Autism Level Up, to discuss shifting autism support from compliance-based behavior management to relationship-centered, autonomy-respecting care. Amy shares her path from occupational therapy and traumatic brain injury work into autism, sparked by her first autistic client and mentorship with Dr. Barry Prizant. They critique outdated behavior charts and the “use your words” mindset, exploring how communication barriers, dyspraxia/apraxia, and high effort demands can reduce initiation, erode trust, and create harmful passivity mistaken for progress. Amy explains SCERTS (Social/Significant Communication, Emotional/Energy Regulation, and Transactional Support) as a partnership model that embeds partner responsibilities into goals and assessment. They highlight emerging collaboration among developmental frameworks, including a coalition advancing funding alternatives to behavioral services in California. Amy describes AutismLevelUp.com’s practical, largely free tools, including energy regulation and “Solve Not Size.”
 
Visit AutismLevelUp.com
 
Topics
00:45 Meet Dr. Amy Laurent
02:01 Serendipity Into Autism
06:24 Questioning Behaviorism
11:52 Funding And Coalitions
16:17 What Is The SCERTS Model
22:28 Updating SCERTS With Autistic Voices
25:49 Initiation And Praxis Challenges
26:37 Dyspraxia Motor Planning Load
28:15 Communication Drain and Mouth Words
28:41 Why Use Your Words Backfires
30:13 Withdrawal and Lost Trust
31:16 Rebuilding Trust by Responding
34:36 Autism Level Up Origin Story
36:45 Energy Regulation Toolkits
38:21 Solve Not Size Framework
40:17 Whole Body Learner and Pain Tools
42:29 Autism Tip Deep Why
44:31 Fact or Fiction Calm vs Regulated
46:54 Parent Confession and Wrap Up

Financial Planning for Autism with Lynda Kommel-browne

David welcomes autism advocate and financial advisor Lynda Kommel-browne, a mom of five whose youngest, Winston, is a non-speaking autistic speller. They discuss advocacy, fighting for inclusion in public school, and Winston’s strengths, including advanced math, acting roles, and rapid foreign-language acquisition (Spanish and Chinese). The conversation focuses on early financial and estate planning: building a team, pursuing Medicaid/state benefits and respite care, and describing needs on a child’s worst day. Lynda explains ABLE accounts (tax-advantaged, broad disability expenses, $20k/year contributions, $100k benefit threshold) versus special needs trusts (often funded with life insurance). They address guardianship vs supported decision-making and share parent confessions about delayed planning.
 
Lynda can be reached by phone via her office number: (203) 226-1559 or mobile: (917) 374-6948 
 
Topics
00:58 Meet Lynda Kommel-browne: Advocate + Wall Street to Special Needs Planning
03:28 Linda’s Family Story & Why Planning Early Matters
05:43 Planning for “Three Lifetimes”: Team, Timeline, and Peace of Mind
07:28 Winston’s Journey: From Early Diagnosis to Finding Communication
09:10 Spelling/Letterboards Breakthrough (Learning on Zoom)
10:32 School District Battles, Presuming Competence & Paving the Way
12:10 College Dreams: Linguistics, Languages, and Accessible Campuses
15:45 Staying in Public School + Using Apex for STEM Accommodations
21:03 Big-Picture Planning: Divorce, Building a Team, and Special Needs Credentials
24:50 Family Roles, Guardianship Plans, and Funding a Dignified Adult Life
26:51 Practical Tools Next: Benefits, ABLE Accounts, and Why You Can’t Wait
29:00 Finding Help for Medicaid & Public Benefits Paperwork
29:55 Applying the Right Way: Describe Your Child’s “Worst Day”
32:30 Why Starting Early Matters: Medicaid, State Programs & Respite Care
36:16 ABLE Accounts 101: Limits, Investing Early, and What You Can Spend It On
40:49 Special Needs Trusts Explained: Trustees, Life Insurance, and Estate Planning
47:07 Autism Fact or Fiction: Presume Competence + ABLE Accounts Aren’t Just for the Wealthy
49:06 Parent Confessions: Planning Wake-Up Call & Guardianship vs Supported Decision-Making
53:22 Final Takeaways & How to Reach Lynda (Don’t Wait to Start)

Spelling to Communicate as a Civil Right

David dives into the controversial message passing test promoted by ASHA, which has significant implications for non-speakers on the autism spectrum. Joined by producer and attorney Dave Yas, they explore the civil rights violations and legal inconsistencies associated with this test. The episode emphasizes the need for a paradigm shift in recognizing effective communication methods for those with non-speaking autism. Listeners are encouraged to join the fight for better, more inclusive communication standards.
Topics
00:55 Today's Special Topic: Autism Communication and Civil Rights
01:31 Introducing Dave Yas: Attorney and Autism Advocate
04:16 The Message Passing Test: An Overview
09:39 Critique of the Message Passing Test
17:33 ASHA's Position and Its Implications
20:59 The Broader Impact on Non-Speakers
27:06 Addressing Childcare Center Accusations
27:39 Ensuring Communication Integrity
29:00 Protecting Vulnerable Populations
30:14 Constitutional and Civil Rights Violations
30:36 Procedural Due Process Explained
32:14 First Amendment Rights and Freedom of Speech
33:10 ADA and Reasonable Accommodations
35:31 Equal Protection Clause
37:40 Organizational Liability of ASHA
44:26 Personal Experience with Spelling to Communicate
50:22 Challenging the Message Passing Test
52:17 Call to Action for Advocacy

Shifting the Autism Narrative with Stacy Badon & Torrin Kearns

David dives deep into dispelling myths and challenging fear-based narratives about autism. Joined by Stacy Badon, an autism education specialist with over 20 years of experience, and Torrin Kearns, an autistic self-advocate, screenwriter, and blogger, the trio discusses the evolving perceptions of autism, the importance of presuming competence, and the challenges faced by parents and individuals in the autism community. They also highlight the necessity of giving oneself grace, understanding communication and regulation, and addressing the current administration's approach to autism. The episode wraps up with memorable tips, personal confessions, and ways to support and connect with the guests online.
 
Stacy Badon:
https://autism4home.com/
@ EverythingAutism 
 
Torrin Kearns:
@autisticauthor
@theautismsage
 
Topics
00:39 Meet the Guests: Stacy and Torrin
02:41 Stacy's Journey in Autism Advocacy
08:30 Torrin's Perspective on Autism Diagnosis
12:06 Challenges and Triumphs: Torrin's Story
20:21 The Power of Connection: How Stacy and Torrin Met
23:53 Combating Fear-Based Messaging in Autism
30:04 Expectations vs. Reality in Parenting
31:53 The Importance of Pivoting as a Parent
33:47 Challenges Faced by Parents of Autistic Children
35:33 RFK Jr. and Autism: A Controversial Perspective
45:28 Autism Tip of the Week
48:40 Autism Fact or Fiction
52:17 Parent Confessions
59:21 Closing Remarks and Contact Information
 

Unlocking Voices with Susan Baker

David welcomes special guest Susan Baker. Susan shares her journey and advocacy for her non-speaking autistic son, Andrew, discussing how the method of 'spelling to communicate' has transformed their lives. They delve into the emotional and physical fatigue that comes with constant advocacy, fighting for acknowledgment of their children's capabilities, and the inherent systemic challenges. The episode also highlights Susan's broader message of finding inspiration, keeping faith in the fight for inclusion, and the importance of grassroots movements. Listener segments include 'Autism Tip of the Week' and 'Autism Fact or Fiction,' providing insightful advice for parents and dispelling common misconceptions about autism.
 
Topics
00:39 Meet Susan Baker: Advocate and Author
01:39 The Struggles and Triumphs of Advocacy
03:48 Andrew's Journey and the Power of Communication
11:33 Challenges in the Education System
17:41 Grassroots Advocacy and Systemic Change
31:27 Personal Reflections and Parental Resilience
35:35 The Impact of the Letter Board
36:55 Teenage Angst and Independence
44:05 Understanding Apraxia
48:31 Autism Tip of the Week
51:36 Fact or Fiction: Your Child is in There
58:10 Closing Thoughts and Reflections